Halloween Showdown
by BlueLightningXD
Summary: It's Halloween in Bikini Bottom! SpongeBob and Patrick are bored and don't know what to do, though. What will they do to pass the time? (One-shot)


**A/N: Sorry, folks! No Spandy this time! No pairings in general too. This is just SpongeBob and Patrick wondering what to do on Halloween (again, with their seasons 1-3 personalities). By the way, this is a SLIGHT crackfic.**

* * *

"SpongeBob, I'm boorrreddd." The chubby starfish whined, lying on his back and gazing up at the ceiling. The aforementioned sponge nodded and sighed.

"You got that right, buddy. Squidward doesn't want to hang out with us today..."

* * *

_"Squidward? Do you wanna play Bubble Bombers with us?" SpongeBob called out to his neighbor, who was in the process of taking his soufflé out of his oven._

_The octopus simply turned his mp3 player up and carried the tray over to his dining area, only to find the two friends sitting in his living room casually._

_"What are you two doing in my house?!" Squidward asked in disbelief._

_"Well, we thought you were busy, so we decided to wait here till you're done!" SpongeBob explained optimistically, with Patrick sitting right beside him, playing his video game._

_"Yeah... I'll be right back..." The starfish muttered as he stuck out his tongue in concentration._

_"NO!" bellowed the octopus as he absentmindedly threw the soufflé at the two._

_Time seemed to slow down when Squidward realized what he did, gasping. SpongeBob gasped in horror as well. Patrick paid no attention to the scene, though. Suspenseful music played as the dessert finally hit the ground, making Squidward grit his teeth in rage._

_"SpongeBob... Please GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!"_

* * *

"...Sandy's busy rebuilding her rocket..."

* * *

_"Hey, SpongeBob! Hey, Pat!" Sandy greeted. SpongeBob gladly waved back, but Patrick simply grunted and focused on his game._

_"Sandy, what should we do tonight? Patrick and I don't know what to do!"_

_The squirrel rubbed her chin in thought and hummed. "Well, I don't know. If you guys don't wanna go trick-or-treating..."_

_"Nope. I already used up my paycheck to buy out the whole store." SpongeBob interjected as he pulled out a huge bag of candy from his pocket._

_While SpongeBob and Sandy were talking, Patrick walked towards a furnace and sat down on it, not noticing that his butt was on fire._

_"What about-" Sandy suddenly stopped and sniffed the air. "Is something burning?" She asked. She and SpongeBob turned to the source of the smoke and shrieked when they saw Patrick's but turning black and crispy (with him still focused on his game, mind you)._

_"PATRICK! YOUR BUTT IS ROASTING!" SpongeBob screamed. The starfish looked up from his game and then looked at his burning buttocks._

_"AAHHH!" He shrieked like a girl. "MY BUTT IS ON FIRE! MY BUTT IS ON FIRE!"_

_"I'll call an ambulance! You get some ice and apply it to his butt!" Sandy commanded urgently. SpongeBob cringed and groaned._

_"Why me?"_

* * *

"It still hurts when I move!" Patrick sobbed.

"Hmm... Let's go on a sugar rush!" SpongeBob suggested.

"Okay! As long as I can eat a lot of candy!"

For the next few hours or so, SpongeBob and Patrick ripped the candy out of their packages and tossed them into their mouths. The more candy they ate, the more dilated their eyes became. When they were done eating, they were twitching and jumping around.

"Hey-let's-go-foil-Plankton's-scheme!" SpongeBob ordered as he twitched. Patrick giggled and they both flew towards the Chum Bucket.

* * *

Meanwhile, Squidward and his clarinet were sitting on his couch, with some candles lighting up the room.

"Clair, do you know what day it is today?" Squidward asked his clarinet seductively as he ran his fingers up and down it's holes. "It's our twentieth anniversary. And do you know what we're going to do?"

Instantly, Squidward crawled towards his clarinet, but that's when his house toppled over. What happened next shouldn't be described, but he said.

"AH! CLAIR!"

* * *

As it turned out, Squidward's house was toppled over by the hyper SpongeBob and Pat. The two friends closed in on the Chum Bucket and giggled evilly. When they entered the restaurant, they froze when they saw what Plankton was doing.

He was caressing a Krabby Patty and using Karen's ingredient-scanner to identify it's ingredients.

"Soon... Very soon..." He muttered.

"STOP-RIGHT-THERE-PLANKTON!" SpongeBob cried.

"WE'VE-COME-TO-MESS-YOU-UP!" Patrick added threateningly, pounding his fist.

"And what will you two numbskulls do?"

That was the worst question he could've asked.

"AH! AH! AAAHHH! NO! NOT IN THE FACE!" Plankton bellowed as SpongeBob and Patrick stomped on him, pleased by his screams.

* * *

**I am so weird. I wrote this while eating my Halloween candy.**


End file.
